Collette Connell, Alabama Fan

We've all seen the video of Collette accosting Saban, but have you seen the music video to Gretchen Wilson's "All Jacked Up"? CLICK HERE TO ENJOY!!! By the way, be sure to notice how the state trooper rips her off of Saban. Also, check out the lady with the baby on her hip in the background when they're giving the Roll Tide. Also, listen in the background when they're interviewing Saban's wife. Also, look... never mind. There's too much to point out. Enjoy it for yourself.

A Lot of History Since UAT Last Beat Auburn

After the September 11th attacks on our country most people were mourning the losses of their friends, family and countrymen. UAT, meanwhile, was sneaking in a rare win against Auburn.

Many years later UAT has yet to enjoy another win against its biggest rival and many things have happened since then. Here’s a look at what things were like the last time UAT won the Iron Bowl:

Steve Spurrier was the coach at Florida
Harry Potter movies didn’t exist
Saddam Hussein was still in power
Lance Armstrong had only won 3 Tour De Frances
Tom Cruise was still married to Nicole Kidman
Everyone still liked Tom Cruise
Bush was a newly elected president
I received a tax check from the Bush Administration
The IRA was still a threat
We had nine planets in our solar system
Hybrid cars weren’t invented
Enron was a good investment
Richard Scrushy was a good CEO
Arthur Andersen was an accounting firm
Starbucks was a new public company

Since that time, long ago, UAT has fired 3 coaches and now looks to it’s 4th for answers. Will Nicolae “Nick” Saban answer the call, and give UAT fans a long awaited victory over Auburn. Chances are “NO”, but only time will tell. Lots of time. The real question is will the Neck Nation give him the time?

Jared Cooper Having Second Thoughts?

Nicolae Carpathia Saban made a visit to East Brewton a few days ago to visit Auburn commitment Jared Cooper. Jared is a life long Bammer fan who committed to Auburn after it became apparent that Shula and his staff were not going to make an offer. Now that Saban has arrived, UAT has an interest in the W.S. Neal guard. Brewton area Dixie League baseball coach, Hugo Williamson, stated, “I coached him 4 years ago when he was 14 and he was bigger than me. He’s a big kid, but I’m not sure he’s got what it takes to be an SEC lineman. He pushes around the little 200 lb guys, but I’m not sure how he’d do against the Groves of the world.”

Saban who has preached integrity, discipline and commitment since he arrived in Tuscaloosa is hoping to steal this kid who has already given his word to another school. Cooper has yet to decide if he will take a visit to Tuscaloosa.

Top 10 Most Memorable Moments of 2006 AU Football Season

This football season, like most, has brought with it many memorable moments. Some moments are memorable because they are embarrassing, others because they are bizarre, and others because they bring honor, joy or satisfaction. I'm sure I've forgotten many memorable moments, but here are the top 10 that come to mind:


10. The last remaining horsemen finally gets a girlfriend Many of us believed he was gay, some believed he was a-sexual, but when the first game rolled around and he (I'm protecting his name if you can't tell) had a blonde on his arm, we were all proud. The impressive thing is she was still around at the end of the season. Great job ___.

9. Glen catches us eating Dreamland For those of you who aren't familiar with Auburn, Byron's is by far the best BBQ place in town. The owner, Glen, works most days and knows most of the everyday patrons. Little Red and I happen to be a couple of those regular patrons. On Saturday, past, Red and I were devouring Dreamland BBQ when along comes Glen. It was a very awkward moment as he spoke to us, and we tried to speak back with mouths full of BBQ. I'm not sure what his reaction will be when we go back to Byron's. I've been too embarrassed to go so far.

8. Florida Game So many moments come to mind when I think of the Florida game. Two post game moments really stick out in my mind, and they are how drunk B.C. got during the game, and the whole "death roll" conversation we had with K.T. Too long to discuss here.

7. Bobby Wilburn Need I say more? Only a few have been lucky enough to be invited to Wilburn's place on the Warrior River. I really can't disclose much more. Memorable.

6. Ole Miss Game There's really only 1 thing that makes the Ole Miss game memorable, and it was the 10 hour round trip drive I made by myself to keep my streak alive. This was the first time in 9 years that I couldn't find a partner to go to the game with me. I decided to take the trip on my own as a soul searching mission. What I found was very disturbing, and I hope I am never left alone with myself for that long again.

5. 100 Game Presentation Before my 100 consecutive game (Buffalo) I was presented with a certificate from Jay Jacobs, handwritten letter from Housel, and a cake. Very thoughtful of the tailgate crew.

4. Dentist Fight Auburn fans hate no other fans more than other Auburn fans as evidenced by the pregame festivities of the Buffalo game. A Dentist from north Alabama broke all rules and pulled his R.V. into our roped off tailgate spot. A melee almost followed, a couple of "sh$t-heads" were thrown back and forth, and both parties reluctantly agreed to coexist for one meaningless game.

3. Jacked up by Alonzo Horton Generally, I try to fire up the passerbys at Tiger Walk. I usually attack an unsuspecting male cheerleader or a 12 year old baseball team; however, this year I was the one being attacked. After a few innocent remarks Alonzo Horton decided to get fired up and bum rushed me. I had no time to plant my feet (not that it would have helped any) and he knocked me about 10 yards out of Tiger Walk. Needless to say, I think we made a connection.

2. LSU Tiger Walk "Remember that time on the way to Tiger Walk..." I do. Because we rode in a golf cart with 5 equestrian team members in our laps. Memorable. Memorable.

1. Dixieland Delight The most memorable thing I can think of this year is memorable because it was completely BIZARRE-O. To open the 4th quarter of the Irons Bowl, Bryant-Denny piped in Dixieland Delight. Weird because it doesn't seem like a football type song. Very odd choice of music. Weirder still because when the piped in music was forced to stop for football play the student section finished the song. "Whitetail buck deer munching on clover, redtailed hawk sitting on a limb, chubby old groundhog, croaking bullfrog....." you get the idea.

UAT Faces Tough Duke Team

After losing 4 out of its last 5 SEC games, UAT is breathing a sigh of relief with Duke coming to town. Duke is by far the worst team in the country, ranked dead last in offensive production. They have been shut out 3 of the 4 times they've played this season, and are averaging 3.2 points a game. Like Bammer, the Blue Devils are not very good at rushing the ball. They average 1 yard per carry, and the team's top tailback has 69 yards rushing on the season. UAT is far from an elite team in the SEC, but OTWS is predicting that our bottom dwellers are better than the ACC's bottom dwellers. Prediction: Duke 28 UAT 31

A Dream Come True!

I know what you're thinking, "What the HELL is going on here?!? What kind of redneck cheeseball gets married at Bryant-Denny (aka JH-West). Click here to read more.

Poorly Coached Team Gives Game Away

In case you didn't notice, a meaningless, but necessary, matchup took place in Fayetteville on Saturday. It was the Arkansas Razorbacks vs. the Alabama-Tuscaloosa Crimson Tide. A game that would help decide how 4, 5 and 6 would shake out in the SEC West. Arkansas took a giant step towards not being a bottom dweller.

UAT put together a 14 play drive that took over 9 minutes off the clock in the fourth quarter then put the game on kicker Leighann Tiffin's shoulders. He missed it. He would miss four attempts in all. The most painful of which came in overtime as Tiffin missed an extra point which cost Bammer the game.

So who do you blame? Most people will look at Tiffin, but what about the always cocky Darby who once again failed to do much on the ground. What about Wilson? He had several costly mistakes. Including a pass while beyond the line of scrimmage and a second forward pass after receiving a deflected ball. Then there's Shula. She is, after all, the coach and leader of this gutless, untrained bunch. As the cameras panned the Bammer sideline it was apparent why this team has continued to struggle year after year. Recruiting! I saw soft, uncoached kids on that sideline. Something has to give if UAT wants to compete with the mid-level teams in the SEC West.