"I ain't gonna believe it", said Donny Bearden of Walker County today on news that the Bear is actually dead. Many people had reported that he was, in fact, dead, and Fox News finally broke the story earlier this morning on Fox & Friends. Reporter E.D. Hill remarked, "We learned that the Bear had actually been dead for years. In fact, it appears that he's turned over in his grave several times." School was cancelled today in Jasper, Gardendale, Capitol Heights, Bessemer and Hueytown on news of the death. "Ain't no wonder we ain't been winning no national championships", said Waffle House employee, "Jo". "We still the power of the South though. Just ask Auburn, we beat their ass for 3 quarters this year." No funeral services are expected since the Bear has, in fact, been dead for several years.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Bammer Nation Saddened By Breaking News
"I ain't gonna believe it", said Donny Bearden of Walker County today on news that the Bear is actually dead. Many people had reported that he was, in fact, dead, and Fox News finally broke the story earlier this morning on Fox & Friends. Reporter E.D. Hill remarked, "We learned that the Bear had actually been dead for years. In fact, it appears that he's turned over in his grave several times." School was cancelled today in Jasper, Gardendale, Capitol Heights, Bessemer and Hueytown on news of the death. "Ain't no wonder we ain't been winning no national championships", said Waffle House employee, "Jo". "We still the power of the South though. Just ask Auburn, we beat their ass for 3 quarters this year." No funeral services are expected since the Bear has, in fact, been dead for several years.
